My Biggest Challenge

Hmmm....my biggest challenge being a professional and having schizophrenia is not the work that I do. No. The biggest challenge is being a family man and a responsible father to my son. He is not even two years old yet and needs a well balanced, healthy family life....and more than anything, he needs a father.

That is why when I feel like there is no hope left for me, when I'm so entrenched in my psychosis and delusions, I take stock in my life and look down at my beautiful, handsome son. My rational mind plays a part here, and this may not be possible for all people with mental illness. However, my medication, paired with a strong rational mind and a wonderful support system, allows me to feel better fast, and get on with life. This does not mean that I do not suffer, I suffer immensly as anyone with a chronic mental illness does. But what I am trying to say is that no matter how hopeless you may feel, "this too shall pass!" Seek out help for yourself, it is not always possible to do it alone.

Sometimes I have the delusion that I am being watched by unseen cameras and people are following me. Well, as frightening as that might sound to you, I tell myself--"Wait a minute, when I'm at work, there are cameras everywhere watching me and those are REAL cameras and I do not feel paranoid at work!" Then, again with the help of some medication, I feel better.